That Man Is You!

In my first article, I mentioned that my wife and I began regularly attending Mass around the time we began thinking about having children.  After several months of this, many big questions began to dawn on me about aspects of my life where I was falling short – partly from ignorance and partly because I foolishly thought I had things figured out.  After Mass one day, a man named Tom came to give some announcements about a new program they were starting at the parish: That Man Is You!

He explained that the program was a men’s fellowship, which focused on helping men to become better husbands, fathers, and men after God’s Own Heart.  He closed his speech by saying that he was going to be in the back answering questions, and that he was looking for help to coordinate the program.  Sitting in the pew, I felt a strong sense that this was going to help me answer some of those tough questions and might equip me better to know the faith.  I leaned over to my wife and said that I wanted to find out more about the program.

I found out that the program’s founder, Steve Bollman, presents a different class each week focusing on a different aspect of the faith.  After the 30-45 minute DVD session is over, the men are encouraged to break up into small group sessions to discuss the topic, share their experiences, and dive a little deeper into each topic.  The topics covered in the first year ranged from a discussion about a man’s role in the family and how he can practice his faith in a more meaningful way.  The lessons were all framed by looking more closely at Scripture, Biblical examples (and counterexamples), and modern examples of authentic leadership in action today.

Quickly thereafter, I had volunteered to help Tom coordinate the program largely because I had the necessary skills of knowing how to operate a DVD player.  I mused to the priest that I had never volunteered to actually do anything outside of normal Mass attendance before.  He remarked that it was the Holy Spirit that urges us to get up and participate, and that many people ignore that nudge.  He praised me for being willing to help out.  More than a year later, I’m very glad that I did.

The best parts about the program for me is the discussion groups that form after the DVD lesson completes.  It was there that I got to sit and listen to life-lessons from men in their 70’s and 80’s, different perspectives from men in their 40’s and 50’s, and I gained some friends in the process.  It helped me to get to know some of the people within our parish much closer, and again… this was something that I never really got to experience before.  In my past, the people I knew at Church were my family members and maybe a few Catholic friends that I went to high school with.  It was (and is) refreshing to have that situation change.

The That Man Is You! program started our second year’s worth of classes last month.  I am pleased to report that things are going very well, and we have started a second session on a weeknight so more men can participate.  If you are interested in how to participate, you can search for a parish near you running this important program.

Also, I want to take a second to thank my friend Tom for allowing me to help him coordinate and run That Man Is You! at our parish.  It has been a great blessing to my family!


8 thoughts on “That Man Is You!

  1. This program looks good. I have a Men’s Reflection group of 7 – 10 men in their 60’s and 70’s. Would this work? Is thier and sample programs on line? Is there a cost for the program? Please advise. God Bless! Deacon John

    • This is a great size… this is about the average size of our weekly meetings and I can tell you it goes along quite well. Here is the link to the organization that runs this program, Paradisus Dei: You can also contact them by email at or by phone at 281-974-3541. They may be able to provide you a sample session or some supplemental materials. I will send you an email with some further details. Thanks for reading, and thank you for your ‘yes’ to Christ!

  2. Josh,

    The wonders of today’s communication vehicles. I looked up, “That Man is You” to see if there were any reviews and found your website. I have been attending and hosting TMIY in Houston since it first started in 04. I still go to St. Cecilia in Houston on Wednesdays to experience the latest Paradisus Dei effort. I was there this past Wednesday, yesterday, and spoke to Steve in person. He lives right behind the parking lot of that church.

    I host the program at another church in Houston but still like to attend the original where I made many friends. I hope that you are still active with the program because they are working on a new series that originated from a retreat to Notre Dame.

    The program gave me courage to be a host at St. Justin in Houston. I know that the Lord is watching over me and giving me what I need to make it happen. The challenge is finding a way to appeal to the younger men. I am 68 and for me it is a joy to bring the program to my parish.

    So I thought I would make a comment and I will tell Steve that I found your site. I am sure he will be delighted to know.


    • Hi RT,
      Thank you for the note! I am so happy to hear that other men are having a similarly moving experience in That Man Is You, and thank you for letting Steve know that you found my website. I had the pleasure of meeting Steve when he visited St. Thomas More parish in Centennial, Colorado and I hope to get a chance to meet with him again. My spiritual life has been greatly improved by the program, please extend my thanks to him when you see him next.


  3. I have a friend who has a son who lives in South Austin near St Ignatius Martyr Church and wanted to know if you could let me know of a This Man is you program near them. Please let me know their number and address .. Thank You Lynn

    • Hi there! I am not directly affiliated with That Man Is You beyond my local level, but they have a group locator available at their website here: Click “Find A Group” in the upper left and enter your location, that’ll get you a contact to the group nearest to your friend’s son. God bless!

  4. Hello, I am just beginning to put together That Man Is You program at AllSaints Catholic Church in Lewiston Idaho. Our parish has only around 350 families, we are steadily losing people to other faiths and the age gap is apparent as our older parishioners are passing away. I attended a couple of other churches and found many people that I thought were still in the All Saints community. When they seen me they cam up and greeted me, They asked when I joined and I said I hadn’t, I told them I wanted to find out why we were losing people. I was told that there was no fellowship, no people seemed to care if they were there or not, t. hey didn’t have the fellowship. when I looked at That Man Is You they have everything men that had left were looking for. I AM SO EXCITED AS ARER THE PRIEST AND CORE MEMBERS ARE SO EXCITED.

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